Shower Brainstorms

I like to stand in the shower and just think. It is the one place in my little house that I can go and push everything else aside and even come before God to converse. That's mostly what my thinking in the shower anyway. But, last night while I was standing in the shower I became extremely confused. I had such terrible mixed feelings about life and my next step.

This is a scary transition for a lot of people, and I'm definitly included in that crowd. I'm 22 and have no real carreer path chosen, I don't know whether to go for my masters yet, and there's just a lot of things I don't know about. I've been praying everyday that the Lord will show me where to go next. *Sigh* I just had a flash back of Sunday School when I was little. I think the lesson was about letting God lead us and putting our trust in Him. In groups of two, one partner had to tie a bandana around their eyes and the other lead them around the room. It was hard being the person not able to see. It is hard being the person that cannot see.

Peace Corps. Where did I leave you Peace Corps!? This plan has fallen by the wayside and every once in a while I'll try to reach a hand out to pull it back on board. Last night I was thinking about it again, in the shower (if only I were there now). Three months ago I would not have cared to leave the country for two years, but now... what has happened?

I can't help but feel like I'm being foolish, but at the same time there's reason to my insane logic. This thing that is holding me back can potentially heal so many wounds and make me grow into the man that I desire to be. And I look at the opportunities that I have. They stand plentiful. They are blessings that God has placed before me, but I can only choose one path. These oppurtunities, at times, seem too beautiful to throw to the side, but where I am and where my heart is telling me to go feels the best.

The Lord says that the world may see His people doing foolish things, but in His eyes and His vision they are wise and perfect. Is this one of those things? Am I being wise? Oh dear, what do I do? I need to take a five day shower to figure this mess out.

Dogs of Eden

Welcome everyone to my blog.  I don't expect my thoughts to really compel people to weekly visits of this site, but rather wish to log about particular thoughts throughout the day that strike me as interesting and want to explore more.  

I am currently waiting for an offer for a job, to which I applied two weeks ago.  I have been in contact with the employer and they will be sending out e-mails for interviews this coming week.  This is impertinant to the story I'm telling though.  I've been planning, only if I get this job, to adopt a dog.  Now, I've been doing intense research on breeds, training, local facilities where I could take my dog for grooming (if needed) and veterinarians in the area.  Within my unrelentless explorations of the dog world I discovered a Senior Cesar Millan, who many may know as the Dog Whisperer.  Interested in the three books that he has written and fancying the idea that I too could possibly whisper to my dog, I ordered the books through my University's Ohio Link program (possibly the most amazing system ever created,  if you have it I suggest that you use it to the fullest ability). 

The moment the first book arrived I was all over it.  I am still reading it.  It's been two days and I'm nearly finished with it.  I usually read much faster but I was surprised at the rate that I have been reading lately, due to classes and assignments, the rapidity that I have flown through this book.  It's called Cesar's Way and it deals with dog psychology.  

I never thought that I would be so enthralled by the subject of dog psychology.  I had to take a psychology class as a Gen., Ed., and found it  mildly interesting, but dog psychology is just so different that it's near captivating in comparison to that of humans.  For example, the order in which we should treat our dogs is typically thought to be affection, discipline, and then exercise.  Rather it's quite opposite than we think!  It should be exercise first and then discipline and last affection.  That is something, I imagine, to be very hard for many to soak in.  I admit, for me too I think it's a little disheartening to think about it.  You'll have to read the rest of the book to understand more about it.  

Essentially Cesar's approach to handling dogs is reminding us that dogs are simply animals.  It's a rather simple concept, but dogs are not humans as we personify them to be.  I can remember my dad telling me when I was a kid obsessed with the idea of owning a pet raccoon or fox that wild animals will always be wild no matter how domesticated they become.  He spoke from wisdom as his father was a Game Warden (now called park rangers), who brought in-need wild animals home all the time.  Dogs are basically the same way.  They still have wild drives that usher them to act certain ways that we as humans misinterpret.  

While I was reading it occurred to me how simple life would be if I were a wild dog.  The behavior is more detailed in the book but basically it entails traveling or "migrating" in a pack for miles upon end, find food and water, and then sleep.  That is essentially all that a dog wants to do, and we as humans are keeping them from it.  Their simple need to explore and walk made me think about my own needs and what I want out of life.  That thought hardly had time to develop when it suddenly dawned on me... animals have never eaten from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil.  

Suddenly as I am writing this I feel tremendously foolish and childish that this thought would drive me to even blog about.  But the idea really astonished me, so I will continue no matter.  Thinking about it, humans are so complex in good ways and bad.  We are complex in that we have problem-solving minds and we relate to each other with love and we have hundreds of different languages and we can express our thoughts and make ground-breaking technological movements.  We can also be complex in a negative way in that we foster relationships while still in another relationship with someone else, can become jealous and covet other people's belongings, plot to cause pain to our brother, and can even plot to kill someone for the fun of it.  Perhaps we wouldn't be even close to the civilization we have become today if Adam and Eve had not eaten from that tree.  Perhaps we would be more like dogs... who would be happy with merely the drive to follow our instincts.  

Perhaps this is all silly and irrelevant.  Perhaps Genesis is just an allegory, where Adam and Eve were a large group of people and the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil was not really a tree, but... something else.  It was a thought and I went with it. 

The book Cesar's Way really is quite intriguing and I hope that all you dog owners out there would open it with an open mind and read what he has to say.  I think was Mr. Millan has to say is pertinent to the American population that owns dogs.  Just do it.